Tinted to the left

 I see my sister drifting peacefully in the water

It's strange because she was never a swimmer

I remember those hot summer days

I remember the cool water's embrace

My sister wanted to learn how to swim in that water

Dad would hold her steady, try to teach her

Oh boy, did she ever kick and scream with joy

She would bring a crowd with her voice

This one time she broke free from my father's grasp

She kicked and screamed as the pool filled her lungs

Within seconds we could not hear her voice

As she became one with that cool water

Heroic dad, dove and pulled her up

She coughed up a lung but her exuberance returned

I imagine she kicked and scream just the same

On that summer night when five guys surrounded her

I imagine she reached out for my father's hand

Begging for him to dive for her one more time

She must have drown for hours in that alley

Before someone found her unconscious body 

She was so peaceful when I saw her

In the embrace of something I did not understand

Sedated by the diluted morphine in her IV drips

But her body, her body carried the story

Bruises of the transient

Battering of the errant

Fracturing of  the fickle

I could not see her like this

Give me justice I screamed where my sister could not

Give my sister justice I screamed at the officer

He looked to the left through the tinted car

"we will catch who did this, go be with your sister"

My sister would not speak

Something unknown filled her lungs

Three days after she stood atop a bridge on Yamuna River

I wanted to scream "please don't leave me"

I wanted to tell her how much she means to me

I wanted to show her that she is still loved

I wanted to hold her in that bear hug

I wanted to give her my her voice

I wanted to kick and scream for her

But how can I ask her to live when she cannot breath

How can I ask her to live if I cannot hear her

How can I ask her to live if I cannot understand her

Yes she took that step forward

Yes she drifts down the river

But NO! She did not take her life

I stood in grief as the politician said through their tinted glasses

"We will protect our daughters and mothers and sisters"

"Elect me"

I stood in grief as the news stations said through the tinted monitor

"We will keep you updated with the latest news"

"Watch us"

I stood in grief as the priest said holding the tinted rosary 

"May her soul find salvation, may she rest in gods arms"

"Pray with me"

I stood in grief as the friends said in their tinted words

"She is in a better place now, it is very unfortunate"

"Come be with us"

And I stood in grief as they all drifted apart

I understand now that women are born falling in this country

I understand now that we do little to stop them from sinking

So what will you say as I stand here grieving 

What will you do to stop your sister from drowning

    _r.d.

Mind To Heart

I don't know who you are... Am I the patron strolling through your exhibition?

As I start reflecting on my stories... Every thing is perfect. The perfect romance, the perfect comedy, the perfect tragedy, the perfect life. There is no one perfect, they are all perfect. If not at the moment, at the very end when you know you have no more time left, you reflect back and you realize it was you no matter the story. So why not accept it while you have the time to appreciate it.

I do not know who you are. I do not know what I should do. I do not even see the choices any more. I am lost in the exhibition...just appreciating every pulse I am allowed spend in this exhibition 

-r.d.

Comments:

In the moment I am the artist. Making decisions to the best of my knowledge. Concurrently, I am the patron, judging myself, reliving those decisions. "The thinking self looking at the acting self". "The mind reasoning the heart". A quote from French philosopher Blaise Pascal "The heart has reasons of which reason knows nothing". It's important that we don't get stuck thinking about how to perfect the future or the past. But that we keep trying. Perfect is made from effort. It's about trusting yourself, and letting your mind be the patron that is lost and just experiencing in faith, enjoying every moment.

We tend to think of perfect as "being happy and successful". It's so easy to start living in your head trying to think of the perfect way to get to that "ideal" vision and never really moving. Or moving and then halting because things didn't go as you envisioned. It's important to keep leaning into the experience. It's about learning that there is no one perfect.

And the proof is all around us, we just listen more to the one that says perfect is being successful and happy. But that's not the case, perfect has nothing to do with success or happy. If you run a story long enough there will be ups and downs. Every story is perfect if you run it long enough. Romeo and Juliet, Titanic, Charlie Chaplin, Mona Lisa, The Sistine Chapel, Dante's inferno... Hundreds of other things where the ending isn't what you would label as happy or successful. But their stories were for sure perfect. "the perfect romance, the perfect comedy, the perfect tragedy". Our challenge is to find happiness in all of these perfect experiences.

You will never know if you picked the right person/path. There is no complete math for it and your gut isn't reliable. You don't ever get to know if you picked right. You just get the results. You get your life. In life, you have to take the plunge without knowing.

I am the subject and I am the patron. Learning how to paint into existence what I envision. But know now even if it doesn't come out how I envisioned, it is still perfect. Because there isn't just one type of perfect.

Meaning to Life

I wonder what is the meaning of life? Sometimes I am scared to let go, sometimes I am scared to hold on. 

The heart quivers. 
The body shivers. 
The mind wonders. 

That is not you.
That is fear. 
But who are you? 

There is no beginning or end. 
There is no good or bad. 
There is no permission or restriction. 

There is just you and a universe of connections. 

Tugging on one takes you away from another. 
In that superfluid suspension you exist. 

You are here. 
You are now. 

Learn how to dance, 
Learn how flow, 
Learn how to be the center of gravity for your connections. 

You give meaning to life... 

-r.d.

Harvest Moon

 I will break through to guide you.

Reach for my hand, as the night falls.

Reach for my hand, when the terror makes you crawl.

Reach for my hand, when the darkness surrounds you.

Reach for my hand, and I will pull you through.

I will break through to light you.

-r.d.

When She Is On The Pole

 When she is on the pole... 
She is the morning fog that fills the world with surprises. 
She slowly brightens the world like the sun breaking the clouds. 
She moves unhindered like the wind. 
She bursts with the fury of a Strom. 
She paints the world in color. 
With every motion she defines presence...

When she is on the pole... 
she is not bound by laws. 
She is not restricted by any border. 
She doesn't not conform to some social construct. 
There is no limiting her possibilities. 
There is no taming her sprite. 
With every motion she defines freedom... 

When she is on the pole... 
She glides between the fabric of the universe. 
Gravity cannot hold her. 
She cannot be bound to some orbit. 
She becomes the embodiment of the unknown. 
She exists and does not exist all at the same time...

When she is on the pole... 
She commends your attention. 
She makes you believe in something greater than yourself. 
She extrudes divine radiance. Her moves dictate a prophecy, "hate and war to be overcome by love and peace". 
She is your religion. 
She demands your faith... 

When she is on the pole... 
She is one with the pole yet she falls.
She moves effortlessly yet she struggles. 
She is invincible yet she bruises.  
She must have done this a thousand times yet she is learning. 
She is innocence and experience. 
She is existence...

When she is on the pole... 
She bends, she twists, she turns, she flips, she twirls, she hangs, she swings. 
She conveys a rainbow of emotions. 
She is determined. Nothing else exists but her. 
She is alive. 
She is life...

-r.d

To My Friend

Take me to your darkest dark. your lowest low. Your greatest apprehension. 

The feelings that keep you on the precipice, just one push away. The challenges that give you the decision every morning to wake up or sleep for eternity. 

Because that is life. A constant battle to overcome obstacles. If the world is not giving us obstacles we create them for ourselves. We see power in overcoming obstacles. 

Take me to the place of your true power.

-r.d.

Inspired by: The casual sharing on social media taking life out of frame by framing moments. This is for my friends. I welcome your darkness and your light. Let's frame life instead of moments together.

Untitled

a canvas filled. a book completed. a symphony composed. at the precipice. the culmination of all that there was. 

Do not close yourself from to them to chase more current things. For they have more to give than anyone else. They are the greatest master pieces created. All they ask for in return is your time.

Inspired by: